How I’m Feeling

As I mentioned in my posts Prozac Winter and The Mood Swing, I recently went up 20 milligrams on the Prozac because of the depression that tends to set in during the winter. [For more on the background, see The Bad Pill Kept Me From The Good Pill and An OCD Christmas]

I’m three weeks into the higher dosage and it’s working — mostly.

I woke up feeling blue this morning and still feel that way, though the sunrise through the living room window helps. Sunday, I went through some pretty wild mood swings.

But most of the time I feel balanced. A friend recently commented in this blog that he sees anti-depressants as more of an art than a science. I see it as both.

Another friend, who has worked as a mental health worker, said my mood swings seem more like a bi-polar thing than OCD.

OCD is the root problem, though one of the byproducts is certainly bi-polar feelings and behavior.

I mentioned Sunday’s mood swings to the therapist, who reminded me that I went through the same thing last time the dose was adjusted. I had a couple touch-and-go weeks and then all was well. I’m starting to see the same trajectory, which is good.

Remember: I’m writing about this from my personal perch. What works or doesn’t work for me is not going to be the same for most other people who deal with some form of mental illness.

That fact is why I like the comments that are coming in. I want to be disagreed with when someone who knows what they’re talking about feels strongly about something.

So I say thank you and keep it coming.

I leave you with the song that best captures my mood this morning: “The Ballad of Love and Hate” from The Avett Brothers:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1cTJV3HK-Xs&hl=en_US&fs=1&]

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